Saturday, 17 May 2014

A wounded soul


Hillary Duff



Things have not changed. Each day i wake up with a hope that everything is going to be like before at the same time i am scared  that what if life brings more problems in my life. My life now has become like that clock which's pendulum has stopped moving. It has stuck in one place. i can not see any changes(good changes) in my life. I guess i am trapped in my life. Once i was a positive person. i could see things from right perspective but now all i can see is negativity.. everything is just contradictory. I know I am just going through the rough phase of my life and I know that one  day i would wake in the morning and realize that all the negative vibes have moved out from my life and I would feel the happiness. Everything would be perfectly alright. I am saying this because this has happened with me earlier. I was a damsel in distress and next day God fulfilled my wish. It is just a matter of time.


    Today morning was nothing exceptional. I woke up with a hope that things would be fine, unfortunately things turned out to be worse. I was shattered, could not think what to do next.The whole day i was crying. I hided my tears as I didn't want anyone to see me crying. i felt dejected. I could not find the purpose of life. All my dreams were shattered into pieces and those pieces hurt my soul and made it a WOUNDED SOUL. I just wanted someone to console me and give me hope that things will be fine but i didnt have the courage to show my tears to the world. I asked God ,why you put people in this situation,they can not bear, why this life has more pains than happiness??  The most painful feeling is that when everything is going wrong in front of you and all you can do is just watch them and could not do anything. Thats the most helpless feeling in the world. I had two options, either to see the misery affecting me and scorching my soul or to walk away from it. I chose the second option as i could not handle the situation anymore. still somewhere i had a hope that i would get what i wanted but nothing happened. The anger, the sorrow, the pain inside me wanted me to give up. I know I am depressed and eventually I will get over it. i am in a great confusion. Am i making fool of myself by hoping things would be fine. Its just a faith that makes me keep going ..I am scared what if my faith breaks. will i ever  get up again and face life.

I know  God is with me and he has decided something good and he would take care of me in every walk of life. These situations have made me strong from a fragile and sensitive girl. I know life is not a bed of roses and no one is leading a perfect life. It is the hope and focus which keep people moving. In these days I lost interest in everything. I love writing  but i could not write anymore. Whenever i tried to write, all the pains and sorrows which time is has given to  me flashes in front of my eyes. I  have lost my self confidence. somewhere in the struggle of life i  have lost my true identity. It is not that I have never been sad but now i am tired and i quit. i am praying to God to make things like before. 
Hopefully in my next article i would write something positive and good about myself.




8 comments:

  1. hey babe, stay strong..things dont seem right sometimes, but they do move on...you speak of positivity at the end..that goes on to tell you want things to change! days like these come and go, i know them too :)
    love xx

    ReplyDelete
  2. Some people have a gift and a curse. Some of us simply feel more than others. It isn't easy, but it is what makes us the way we are. Be strong my friend, and hopefully you can continue to use your gift to convey your feelings in the beautiful manner that you do without letting it tear you up inside.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey there, you know life is a roller coaster ride, so enjoy the downs just like you enjoy the ups, never give up. And just like happiness, sadness is also interesting, because then you get to understand your feelings, emotions deeply and you try to decipher their true meaning in your own way, just a part of growing up, and it's normal. You should write them down whenever you feel low, in the form of poetry, or just a paragraph of emotions, or maybe a photograph, you will love it later I promise. Now cheer up and have a great week ahead, love. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. thanks everyone for motivating me by sharing your lovely comments.I try to express my feelings in words and blog here because i know that my amazing angels are there to encourage me. Its amazing that people with whom i have never met understand you completely. God bless you all.. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm sorry, but the animations divert the attention from the seriousness of your topic.

    I'm sure you will come out of this phase sooner than you expect :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Purba.. Will keep this in mind next time :)

      Delete
  6. If you want your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend to come crawling back to you on their knees (even if they're dating somebody else now) you must watch this video
    right away...

    (VIDEO) Get your ex CRAWLING back to you...?

    ReplyDelete

someone with paws holds your heart!!!